lets put some perspective on it.

i used to have a team. a group of people who i could vent to about my life and come up with the best solution for the situations i always get myself into. there was more than one because, lets be honest i NEVER share all my sides to just ONE person. anyways if one person wasn't right for the situation the other 2 would be. i have enough friends that when one fell off, i could mold someone else to fill the void. generally it was always the one space that was temporary. Brandon and Ashley remain the same and it was that third person who remained in rotation.
somehow i lost that.
i barely talk to ashley or brandon. (nothing happened, just life. i live 3,000 mi away so life happens) the people who have held the temporary position have moved on with their lives and found a new job.
but my life isnt getting less unnecessary. esp with this campaign coming in 3 weeks.
im freakin out.
Taylor is halfway MIA and i haven't spoken to (or AIMed, or Emailed, or Text) Michael in at least a month. im starting to freak out.
i think thats why i tried to reach out to people i banned myself from contacting.
luckily GOD is looking out for my well being.
Person A* that im not allowed to speak to recently deleted his myspace. im not aware of a FB and not bold or desperate enough for a phone call.
Person B* has turned off the text msg ability on their phone. no FB and i kno they dont check their myspace.
that leaves me with...
Person C* this is probably the one who is best for my well being. they responded to my email. and restored hope and also opened my mind to scary possibilities. i kno im the only person who loves person C as much as i do and i kno that person C has my best interest in mind. they are not materialistic or trying to sleep with me. ive known them my entire life, even if it wasn't as well as i could. still. i gave person A and person B more than one chance and yet person C is rarely ever afforded one chance. they are not bad because of their character, they simply make the wrong choices and deal with the wrong people. if they can survive this, we can come out stronger.


*names have been changed

btw i had a bunch of tests and my computer wasn't working so sorry i've been MIA. was this on topic?